Video game movies haven’t had an easy time, and by that, I mean they all pretty much suck. The current highest-grossing film based on a popular gaming franchise is 2018’s ‘Tomb Raider‘ with a 51% score on Rotten Tomatoes. Not much of a success considering it was adapting one of the most iconic characters of gaming culture. On a more positive note, this year’s Detective Pikachu gave us a glimmer of hope that gaming movies could potentially be fun and profitable. Still, we at Fiction Talk scratch our heads every time a new film is announced, especially when it comes down to the casting. So shall we look at some?
Sonic The Hedgehog
Let’s just get the elephant out of the room as quick as possible. Sonic The Hedgehog will suck. You know it, I know it, we all know it. A film disaster in the making, that many can smell from a mile away. By this point, I can sense when a movie will flop hard, just by its marketing. A reworked hedgehog, a goofy Jim Carrey as the main villain and real-live actors instead of a 3D animated world, are all signs of bad quality.
While Jim Carrey may be the only redeeming factor, even he can’t save this travesty, so we might as well just give up all hope on this being good. That still doesn’t stop us from reviewing the film, and you can bet we will go into the smallest details when it comes out. I’ll just need a bottle of whiskey or something stronger to sit two hours through it all, cause it won’t be fast.
Continuing this theme of film disasters is Paul W.S. Anderson’s new attempt to kill a franchise. While there is no doubt that his wife, Milla Jovovich, is a great actress, together as a team they made some of the worst movies of all time. Resident Evil was their previous attempt at bringing survival horror to the big screen, and guess what, it hit rock bottom. Having little to do with the series, it crammed in Jovovich in every action-packed scene as much as possible.
So what’s different this time around? Well, from the looks of it, nothing. The setting is different, as Anderson saw fit to ditch the zombie apocalypse and go into the fantasy genre. However, this looks nothing like Monster Hunter. Instead, Jovovich looks more like a sci-fi space trooper than an actual monster hunter. With this team-ups history of bad movies, we can already see where this one is going.
Now let’s go back to Resident Evil for a bit. If you thought we were done with it, you are far from right. The bad news is, a new film in the series will be coming out. Even worse news is that it will follow the plot of previous movies but will be inspired by Resident Evil 7. As it can’t get even worse, a new director will helm the project. And as much as this is a good sign, that they finally got rid of Anderson, it’s still pretty bad considering it continues the story of Alice.
The project is currently conceptualized by director Johannes Roberts best known for 47 Meters Down. Yeah, I know you never heard of it, me neither. While there are no concrete details about this project yet, just the thought of it already makes us turn into zombies and eat whoever thought of this idea.
It’s about time we cooled down a little from all these negative entries and look towards a brighter one. One movie I actually look forward to is the upcoming Mortal Kombat Reboot. Not only am I a big fighting game fan, but a huge Mortal Kombat one as well. James Wan, of The Conjuring and Aquaman fame, is behind the project. Already, the film is shaping up nicely even with lesser known actors for the roles of Sub-Zero, Scorpion, and Raiden.
Wan has also displayed prior knowledge of the franchise and is aiming for an R-rating full of blood and most importantly, fatalities. The story will most likely follow the plot of the first game and will revisit the setting of the original 1995 film. Still, this one looks like it might work, and we hope more news will surface soon.
An Uncharted movie sounds like an excellent idea on paper. Iconic setpieces, a likable main protagonist and supporting cast, and treasure hunting. What’s not to like? Well, for starters, the upcoming Uncharted movie won’t be what many fans expected. First off, the film will center on a much younger Nathan Drake, portrayed by friendly neighborhood Spider-Man actor Tom Holland.
So far, so good. The main issue I have with the movie is Holland’s co-star. At the time of writing, it has been confirmed that of all people, Mark Walberg will take on the role of Victor Sullivan. Walberg has already starred in a game adaptation of Max Payne, and let’s just say it wasn’t that good. I’m anxious to see where this is going, but with such a miscast I’d rather just watch the fan movie with Nathan Fillion, which is a worthy adaptation.
When it comes to space operas, Star Wars is one of the first to come to mind. In the gaming community, it’s Halo that steals the spotlight, and someone thought it would be a great idea to make a big-budget movie out of it. The whole film is kept under lock and key like Area 51, but what we do know is the actor behind the space marine. Pablo Schreiber of American Gods will fill the shoes of the Master Chief. The executive producer on board the whole thing includes Kyle Killen, and Steven Kane, while Otto Bathurst will sit in the director’s chair.
Metal Gear Solid
Phew, where do I even start here? As it turns out, this is not just another troll from Kojima and is actually happening. To go even further, Kojima will have just creative influence over the film, and will not be a producer nor director. Instead, the film will be directed by Jordan Vogt-Roberts, known for Kong: Skull Island. I can already tell this will not end well. Why? Because Metal Gear is known for its attention to detail. For a guy who made a movie about a giant ape, details are least important.
Especially when you have Oscar Isaac star as Solid Snake. I love Issac, he is in my favorite movie of all time. But who okayed this? Isaac has not been 100% confirmed on the matter, and if this movie has any chance of success, it will need to find a suitable actor for the job.
Let’s be real here, John Cena is a badass. And having John Cena play another iconic badass such as Duke Nukem, is a marketing gold mine. These two are similar in every way possible, and I give the man who thought of this an Oscar right away. The movie could be campy, making fun of the nostalgic tropes we come to love over the years.
Much like in the older games, Duke can poke at iconic gaming and cinema characters with style. Make the movie more like Shazam, and the recipe is there. Who knows, maybe Duke can make a comeback through cinema over video games. Just one word of advice, don’t take forever.
Don Bluth is a master in the arts of animation. His most notable contribution to gaming came in the form of an arcade game, Dragon’s Lair. So in 2016, Bluth started a Kickstarter campaign to bring his masterpiece to the big screen. The campaign was successful, and Bluth acquired over 700k dollars in a span of a few weeks.
Since then, he has been working hard to bring us the world of Dragon’s Lair, with a reworked plot that differs from the original game. It is still unknown where the movie currently sits, but Bluth reassures us that it will be coming out soon. Let’s just hope that old age doesn’t catch up to him before completion. With the rise of 3D animation, this 2D classic could mean a comeback for future projects similar to it.
Crime dramas always saw more positive feedback on television rather than cinema. However, Donnie Yen thinks otherwise and is currently pushing the production of a Sleeping Dogs adaptation. Yen will also star as the main character of the film. An undercover police officer, Wei Sheen, on a task to undermine a Hong Kong triad.
It is said that the movie closely resembles 1992′ Hard Boiled. For now, only images have surfaced of Donnie Yen as the main character, but honestly, it’s enough to get me pumped. A good action thriller with Ip Man at the center of it, is a pretty good pay off, and could actually work.
The Metro series technically originated as novels but saw a massive rise in popularity thanks to the games, so that’s the reason it’s on this list. Since the release of Metro Exodus, Dmitry Glukhovsky, the author of the universe, has expressed a desire to bring his work to cinema form. I’ve read the books and played the games and honestly think that a TV adaptation would be more welcomed than a movie one.
The main problem with films being adapted from other media is that it’s hard to place everything necessary in a two and a half-hour span. This could be a potential problem for Glukhovsky, but since the movie will be based on the novels rather than the games, it might not be such a problem after all. All in all, I am complete down for this as a big fan of his work.
The last entry has to be the least positive one from my perspective. Yes, a Minecraft movie is being made. Peter Sollett, of relatively unknown movie fame, will be in charge of the film, as its director and writer. A small portion of the script has already been leaked online. It is revealed that the main plot of the movie will focus on a young girl on a quest to defeat an ender dragon. What is there more to say about Minecraft? If you were expecting a complex plot, go watch a better movie. I get the fact that this will mainly be aimed at the younger audience, but as with The Angry Bird’s Movie, it sucks even by children’s standards.
Other Announced Projects
While there are a lot more movies that have been announced, we couldn’t cover them all due to the lack of any details. So we will just list them here for you to see. Other upcoming adaptations will come from Gears of War, Mega Man, Call of Duty, Rainbow Six, Super Mario Bros, Five Nights at Freedy’s, and Altered Beast. We are also to expect sequels for both Tomb Raider and Detective Pikachu shortly. Dear god.
With the way things are standing, video game movies aren’t slowing down, but are going even harder than before. And with their questionable quality, looking at you Uwe Boll, this might as well be a giant disaster train on fire. However, there are still some glances of potentially good movie adaptations, and who knows, maybe they will save the day in the end.
The Ultimate Agent of Chaos. Honks at every type of media. The Unhinged Goose